Suzette Toews: 'An Encounter With Grit and Grace'

There’s a sleek new storefront that has appeared in the semi-industrial area of 42nd Ave SE. Its contemporary black façade stands out among a dusty mix of trade suppliers and small community food stores.

It is late afternoon, and I pull into the parking stall conveniently beside the front door. The sign “INTERIOR LIVING” looms large above me as I adjust my mask and navigate my way between two tall planters bringing a much needed touch of green to this landscape, and make my way inside.

I feel like I have stepped through the looking glass! It is simply gorgeous. Light and airy, and full of beautiful and inspiring furniture and décor vignettes. Colours, textures and shapes all in harmony. The energy is tranquil and happy.

I see Suzette, elegant and as always impeccably stylish, busily discussing the next phase of in-store installations with a friend. A bar for social events – I can see this working well! It’s the kind of place you want to stay a while.

I’m curious as I watch her deep in discussion and wonder how this smart and quietly spoken woman actually achieved this. How did she create this bricks-and-mortar expression of her dreams, and not settle for less, fearful of failure, like so many?

““Setbacks and disappointment part of the growth. Evaluate the situation and learn from the experience. Cry if you need to, drink wine if you want to, but then move on.””

The soft music plays on although the store is now closed. Savouring a glass of cabernet, we find a cosy corner to relax and chat.

Suzette’s story unfolded as we spoke. Certainly not born with the proverbial silver spoon - on the contrary, her early years held something of far greater value. A solid family with hardworking parents (father a German immigrant and mother from a humble farming community in northern Saskatchewan) starting from scratch, running a family automotive-related business underpinned by what we now call “old fashioned values” and integrity. As soon as she could, she helped out in every facet of the business and quickly learned the entrepreneurial skills required.

Marriage and a baby forced change at the age of 23. No longer wishing to work full-time, she did courses and part-time work. After a few years, she found herself in the position of a single mom with two little boys.

(This is where I pause and listen for any suggestion of victimhood. Of disempowerment or helplessness……. Nothing. Not even a hint.)

“Setbacks and disappointment part of the growth. Evaluate the situation and learn from the experience. Cry if you need to, drink wine if you want to, but then move on.”

Undaunted she continued on her path.

““Clothes are really important. Be professional and take pride in your presentation. Dress for the environment – in this store the expectation for staff is a sense of style and being put together.””

Her work and career took her through a series of twists and turns, always strategically heading toward fulfilling her desire to work in the world of design. When out of her depth she attended courses, learned from those around her, and found skilled mentors every step of the way.

 “Motivation - the adrenalin comes when I am challenged and need to push myself to find solutions. Some may call it an obsession!”

Fiercely independent, endlessly curious and preferring to work as a contractor rather than an employee, the years of hard work soon started to pay off.

 “Just do what you love, and thrive. I am not motivated by money. However, it seems to follow naturally when you have passion for what you do.”

An interesting story, but I wanted more, as it is an attitude to the circumstance that influences one’s journey in life. Delving a little deeper I found honesty, integrity, and a hugely positive perspective on life.

 “Finding a work/life balance is something I continually strive for. When I am balanced, I am fulfilled. Embracing good energy and contributing to a positive work environment is key for me. Commit to learning and continual growth.”

We talked about her managing the store and finding suitable employees.

 “At Interior Living when interviewing applicants, we look for a team player with a good personality, positive attitude, enthusiastic, authentic, committed, honest, and of course fun!”

 “Clothes are really important. Be professional and take pride in your presentation. Dress for the environment – in this store the expectation for staff is a sense of style and being put together.”

Finally, we addressed the subject of women in business. As an entrepreneur, there is no limit to where she and her business partner can take this!

“This is a proud time for women. Women have power. Our business is led by two women embracing opportunity and making it happen. With our store, Interior Living, and integrated neighboring art gallery, Gibson Fine Art, we can showcase success. We employ women and the majority of our clients are women. Many are highly educated and successful. Women are supportive of each other and like to play a role in their success!”

Yes, there were times she had to cry, drink wine and get on with it. Nevertheless, the journey has brought her to the present moment and this amazing store, which I personally am in no hurry to leave, simply wanting to bask in the ambiance as I see the late afternoon sun streaming in and bathing the furniture, décor, and art in a soft and gentle light.

However, it is time to head home. Suzette stays to finish a few things and lock up the building. I drive away with a smile, delighted by time well spent.

Written by:  Mickey Foulds

“A Little Bit Of Therapy” Behind The Fitting Room Curtain With Carl Abad

You’ve browsed the racks and rails, found potential winners and head to the fitting rooms. Six items or less – the coat hangers cut into the side of your hand a little as you wait for a room. Excited and a little apprehensive, you step into that small space and carefully hang the garments on available hooks and draw the curtain behind you. Then it begins…

The glare of unforgiving fluorescent lights is not for the fainthearted. The close proximity to the mirrors in this small space makes the avoidance of reality impossible. Before long you feel defeated, slumped on the small bench looking at the enemy which has been hung limply back on the hangers, regretting every cocktail or cupcake that has ever passed your lips.

There it is. Your body is All Wrong and Nothing Looks Good. And it’s All Your Fault.

Really?

Call in the experts, because this dilemma needs some examination. I have managed to corner the ultimate guru of wardrobe wisdom, stylist Carl Abad, who for many years has been the witness and saviour of countless fitting room meltdowns.

We need to look at the causes, get a diagnosis and find a cure!

Carl smiles, “A little bit of therapy”.That’s how he defines what he does. We are sitting on a sidewalk patio in Sunnyside, sheltered by the tall red brick building from a rather chilly wind. Carl has a presence. Magnificently dressed, large designer sunglasses, bejewelled with his own unique brand of fun bling, but what strikes me is his clear and direct gaze. Confidence without arrogance. Non-judgemental. You immediately feel safe.

He explains “Retail stores are there to sell. You will be told you look great, you are excited, you purchase it and take it home. Next thing, you put it on and your friend looks at you and says ‘what on earth are you wearing?’ Suddenly deflated, you’ve lost that happy feeling and you’re left to see the truth.”

I have consulted with him in the past - a three-hour session which was infinitely more than just shopping for clothes. He is dead honest. He tells you why it does or does not work. I still feel the tug of his hand on a pair of pants he had brought me to try. I knew they looked really bad on me, and when I pulled the curtain aside Carl’s face immediately confirmed this. He touched the thick fabric which did not effectively drape or skim my shape and explained why they were wrong for me.

The pants were wrong, not my body.

Our coffee arrives, a welcome hot drink. Carl states emphatically “You are always right, because you are YOU!”  That simple comment turns it upside down. “It’s not YOU who has the problem, but rather the clothes that are wrong for you.”

The big fight is against media influence, that external yardstick by which we measure ourselves, yet which has no practical relevance. It’s an absurd, unwinnable battle often culminating in dysmorphia.

Carl’s insights continue “Understand your body in a truthful manner. Not referencing TV or magazine images. Look without comparison. When you take that away, you can love what you see. If you are already loving media images, it will be hard because you cannot match that. Have an open conversation with yourself. Out loud. Hearing yourself saying it will make it real. Constantly doing that, and not comparing, is where the journey starts.”

He repeatedly emphasises that the key is to stop comparing.  It’s an inner change we need to make. His “little bit of therapy” is bringing clarity. 

“You can only control yourself and your perceptions. Stop comparing yourself to others.”

We need to be educated by the likes of Carl. Someone who will honestly “tell you why, show you why and discuss both what is good or bad. To know the ‘why’, ie why certain items feel good. To educate you for future shopping. It is very personal.”

“You can only control yourself and your perceptions. Stop comparing yourself to others… confidence starts small and then grows to all areas of your life.”

Carl Abad

This education is critical, the missing piece. We cannot simply translate from a magazine or website. We need to understand skin tone, colour palate, technical aspects, proportions and style, as well as where to start. We also need time and focus – we do not give ourselves the time to carefully prepare and think about our wardrobes, and we neglect to edit.

He next turns to the subject of confidence. “Women dim their light, as they don’t want to be judged. When you are confident, you are not worried about the opinions of others. When you are put together well, you stand differently. Clothing is a shield. It does not change everything, but it is an extra tool. Confidence starts small and then grows to all areas of your life.”

It is empowering knowing that you look good. Another layer is added when someone tells you so – not so much for the compliment but for the feeling you have someone on your side who sees you in a positive light.

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We continue to chat. About his own journey, about success and failure (“There is no failure. You either win, or learn”), about social media and the modelling industry, about sheep in a field  (more about that another time!). I don’t want this visit to end.

Carl is hugely inspiring and delivers the unvarnished truth with grace. He helps us create better versions of ourselves, both inside and out. It would be my wish for everyone to spend time and go shopping with this wise style guru, even if just for an hour or so. It is an investment and time wonderfully well spent on something that is so much more than clothing. It is an experience that can change both your outer and inner worlds.

And in addition, at the end of it, you will walk away confidently with an outfit that your friends will applaud.

Written by: Mickey Foulds

Teri-Ann Begin: The Girl In The Three Piece Suit

The theatre is a place where we enter the world of imagination and possibility, of hopes and dreams, and vivid stories exploring the length and breadth of the lives we lead. Magnificent scenery and elaborate outfits create an illusion for the audience, and the actors fully immerse themselves into new identities as they put on their wigs, makeup and costumes and become someone else for the next few hours. 

Art indeed imitates life, and as Shakespeare aptly observed, “All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players”.

A young student at the Fort William Collegiate Institute School in Thunder Bay, Northern Ontario was already intuitively aware of the transformative power of costume in her early teens, and the role she wished to play on this world stage.

Teri-Ann Begin smiles as she recalls, “I wore three-piece suits to school because I always wanted to be a business woman…….and no, the other kids didn’t think it was strange because I was in a band. I played the flute and the piccolo. I thought we were the cool group.” She laughs easily. “After all, it was the seventies and everyone wore weird clothes!”

The aphorisms “act as if”, “fake it until you make it” and “build it and they will come” have become popular mainstream beliefs for many, frequently referred to as the Power of Intention. Personal presentation and dress play an integral role in this journey to realising one’s goals.

 There was however nothing fake about the girl in the three-piece suit –working hard and being successful was in her DNA. She discovered she had a gift for sales, and quite simply states the reason. “I talk to people”.

It is late afternoon and I am grateful for the air-conditioned relief of Teri-Ann’s home, perched high above the silvery Bow River winding its way through the city below. It is a gracious and welcoming executive home, a testament to 34 years of climbing the real estate ladder in Calgary and reaching the upper echelons of success.  We chat for a while, then Teri-Ann leaves the room briefly. I look around and am struck by the lack of pretentiousness – the space speaks of family and community, of relaxed meals, and the business of daily life.

I also know that within these walls is her office, housing the highly successful RE/MAX Real Estate (Central) Begin Group managed in partnership with her daughter, Stephanie Begin. It is an enviable success story fuelled by a 92% referral rate and a strong performance in the corporate relocation sector. It is run as a tight ship, with Teri-Ann and Stephanie leading by example, uncompromising with regard to their expectations of excellence from the team.

I want to see her wardrobe, but already know it will be filled with well-tailored high-quality professional outfits. Mostly black and red, the power colours which suit her well. I note that today for my visit she is wearing a simple relaxed denim dress.

“If in all your actions you focus on making the world a better place, especially with respect to the people you meet, you in turn will have what you need”

Our paths have crossed many times for over a decade, and I have been intrigued by her stories of hiking across England and climbing Mt Kilimanjaro in Africa. Her positive, proactive and honest approach to life helps her navigate challenges with tenacity and integrity. It takes courage, and she makes it look easy.

Teri-Ann said she “talks to people”.  It goes far beyond that – she tells me the driving force in her business and in life is her desire to help people. She clearly listens to people too and makes them feel valued. She is passionate about maintaining contact with others – she does not merely orchestrate the sale or purchase of a house, and then disappear with her dues. Clients who purchased homes with her help return decades later when it is time for the next move. Such trust and loyalty is deservedly hers.

I ask her perspective on strategies for coping with personal difficulty, and without hesitation, she replies “No matter how difficult things are at any point in your life, you don’t need to look far to find someone in a worse position than you. Find that person and then do what you can to make their life better. You will find your own issue is no longer that bad.” She tells me her mum always volunteered, and taught her that “God has given us the best life possible, and it is our responsibility to give back.” 

Following in these footsteps, Teri-Ann initially became a Girl Guide leader. Later, looking for further opportunities to give back, a client suggested that she might be interested to volunteer with assisting women trying to get into the workforce. This perfect fit for the astute business woman has led to 15 years of significant contribution of her time, talent, and energy serving the needs of women at Making Changes.

I next ask her what she looks for in others that would earn her respect, and once again the answer is quick and concise “how they treat serving staff, older people and also people who are not dressed well”.

All I can see in her comes from inner strength, hard work and an unfailing belief that “if in all your actions you focus on making the world a better place, especially with respect to the people you meet, you in turn will have what you need”.

I leave, and as I drive home I reflect upon this rare encounter with someone who has spent a lifetime in unswerving commitment to her vision, helping others who are less fortunate by giving a hand up, and serving every client privileged to work with her to the very best of her ability.

The executive attire she now wears is no longer a costume, but simply a reflection of the remarkable business woman within.

Written by: Mickey Foulds